How To Love Yourself Correctly

God vs. The World

Grace Bianco
5 min readJan 13, 2022

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By Grace K. Bianco

To love yourself is to first love God.

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As New Age beliefs boom, some of God’s word is being glazed over. For unbelievers, this is expected, but some of these views are being normalized in the Christian world. Everything is becoming more about you and yourself, but if you even begin to read the Bible, God says the exact opposite.

As a huge advocate for self-love, I have really had to look into what self-love looks like for a Christian. It’s possible to love yourself, but the way to actually go about it isn’t what many would call SELF-love.

Confidence — Loving One’s Own Image

“So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God He created them; male and female He created.” — Genesis 1:27

I think all of us could very much agree that God is perfect. If God is perfect, He must have made us to be perfect like Him. Our flesh is what causes us to sin. We aren’t flawless when looking within. When it comes to our looks though, we were made in His image. I can’t say exactly what that means God looks like, but God knew exactly what He was doing when He created each of us.

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So, when we hate on our looks, what are we really saying about God?

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful. I know that full well.” — Psalm 139:13–14

This verse in Psalms give us our answer. God knit each of us together in our mother’s wombs. We are all fearfully and wonderfully made in God’s own image. If we believe we are so full of flaws, wouldn’t that mean that God had to have made mistake? But can God make mistakes?

Next time you look in the mirror, remind yourself that God made you exactly how you are supposed to be. He gave you those features, because He believed they would look best on you. When you think you see a flaw, remember that God makes no mistakes.

Self-Care is a Part of Self-Love Too

“The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.” — Mark 12:31

The world will tell you to put yourself first. You should come before your friends, your family, and even your spouse. The world preaches to say, “No,” to others more often. Take care of you before you take care of them. Put your own needs before others.

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Again, the Bible says otherwise. I believe to take care of yourself you take care of others who need more help. The verse in Mark already expects us to love ourselves, but it is also saying to love those around us just as much.

As many of you know, I struggle with anxiety and have since I was four. Anxiety makes it super easy to fall into a “pity party” type mindset. My mom always told me to focus on others more than myself. It’s hard to pity yourself when you are helping people more in need.

(Please read Matthew 25:34–39 for more context) “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’”

To take care of those in need is to take care of Jesus.

These are just a couple of verses that show us life is not supposed to revolve around us. I encourage you to also look up these Bible verses as well: Hebrews 13:16, Proverbs 3:27, Philippians 2:4, James 2:14–17, and 1 John 3:17. It’s just a few, but these were some that I came across that I feel really apply here. If you know of any others, please comment them down below.

The Greatest Form of Self-Love

I believe the greatest love is the love of God. When we love God and follow Him, life is not suddenly painless and a piece of cake, but the comfort and joy God continually gives us does make life more bearable. We aren’t promised easy, but we are promised an eternal reward.

Loving God and others more than ourselves isn’t always easy. Sacrifice isn’t supposed to be a breeze. To show true faith, we have to show God how far we are willing to go.

“Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” — 1 John 4:8

Life is temporary, but God is forever. The pain of today can’t compare to the forever years in eternal paradise. We can’t focus on ourselves when our goal is to be with the God who loves EVERYONE.

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“My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” — John 15:12-13

I believe to truly love yourself is to love God first and people second. You come third. When you stop focusing on yourself, you can’t get caught up in your own worries and negativity. We are called to be Christlike, and Christ gave up His life for YOU. So, what are you willing to do and give up for others?

The world says to put yourself before others, but if you die tomorrow, your love for yourself did nothing for others. God says to love others, and your love will be rewarded in heaven.

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To love yourself is to first love God.

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Grace Bianco

I am the author of “Party Pooper: Growing up with Anxiety.” I love oversharing my life. I talk about my faith, marriage, mental health, & everything in between.