I Am On The Verge Of Breaking
My anxiety doesn’t care about the happy things.
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By Grace K. Bianco
My anxiety has even been able to find scary things in all the good things.
I really don’t even know how to describe my mental health these days. I always call myself a happy person. However, these days my anxiety seems to be convincing me that I am just really good at hiding things.
On the outside, I am smiling. On the inside, it’s a full on battle.
When it comes to what I write on here, I do my best to show what mental illness really looks like. For those who don’t have it, I want to help them to see what it is like. For those that do have it, I want them to see they aren’t alone.
Today, I want to share the good that’s going on in my life. I am also going to share how my anxiety doesn’t just stop, because other things are going right.
If you ask me how I am, I would tell you that I am great.
I most likely would even believe it myself.
I would tell you that my husband and I finally moved out of the camper. We just sold it last night. We made a $2,900 profit. We moved into a duplex with three bedrooms and two baths. Movers will pack and move all of our stuff next week from our house in SC to TN. If you have read any of my other blogs, you know this is huge.
I would tell you that the one week that I spent in our new place went great. It is such an upgrade from the camper. We also happen to live in the town that I love most in TN. My friend, my church, and my favorite coffee shop are all minutes apart from me now. I am only ten minutes from Walmart when I used to be thirty. Trust me, as a housewife, this is better than it sounds.
I would tell you that I am getting my life together. With a bigger and more stable place to live, I can have a better routine. I have so many plans for my new life. I want to babysit again, start a women’s Bible study with the friend I have mentioned, and focus on my physical health.