I can be like this. Sometimes, I fake till I make it BAD. I am very happy despite my mental health issues, but even when I start to go downhill, I always want to hide it. I still have a big smile on my face. It helps sometimes to distract myself, but other times, it leads to a breakdown. I am glad that you were able to learn how to avoid this for yourself and your girls. It's not always easy to pull away from that kind of thinking. <3