I’m 22 & Scared To Be Home Alone
By Grace K. Bianco
You may shoot backwards when you were expecting to shoot forwards, but no matter how crazy it gets, you know you will always keep going.
The thing with anxiety is that new fears could easily develop, and they will take over your life. It’s hard for people to understand, because the only line you will hear as “comfort” is, “You used to be okay with this.” Well, things change, and that comment only makes one feel weaker.
Today, I will talk about my recent paranoia that has been taking over my life.
My “New” Fear
I put quotes on new, because it isn’t 100% out of the blue. I have had problems in the past with this fear, but recently, it has been much more consistent.
I am scared to sleep alone at night.
I feel like a child when I say that. I only ever hear about kids struggling with these kinds of fears. I know there are plenty of adults who do, but it is a topic that no one talks about.
When I got married, I was slightly paranoid when my husband and I were long distance, but it wasn’t a big deal. I just would hear something, and be scared for a second. It would pass as if it never happened.
When it started…
I love learning about true crime. The more I watched the more I realized how common these instances are. This was the start of my paranoia.
For a while, I felt pretty comfortable back home. Our house is in a neighborhood, and we are just feet away from our neighbors. I don’t know any of them, but I still took comfort in that.
One day, my dad told me, “When you come and go from the house, you don’t want your neighbors to notice you’re on your own.” WHAT THE HECK? How could I possibly control that?