Tales of a New Marriage

February 25, 2021

Grace Bianco here. I have been married for forty-six days.

We started the morning off with my husband getting up and going to work. I went back to sleep.

I was super tired and kept falling back asleep. I slept through my husband texting me that he was going to come home for a little bit. He woke me up with his little knock to let me know it’s just him.

It was only 9:30, but we laughed about me being lazy and sleepy.

He stayed for a little over an hour, and I loved it. I wasn’t expecting him to come home to me in the middle of his work day.

When he left, I reserved another night at the hotel.

I did some reading and writing until my husband got home from work.

When he got home, I got a bad feeling in my gut. I just knew he got night shift. This would mean 12 hour nights six days a week. When he is at work, I will sleep. When he is home, he will sleep.

He is a radiation protection technician. He works seasonally. My husband doesn’t have a lot of say in where, when, and what time he has to work. He goes where they tell him. Sometimes, he gets lucky and is able to switch to day shift, but he didn’t get lucky this time.

When I finally got up the courage to question him, I was told what I already knew. I could feel my heart drop, and the tears build up immediately. This would mean that not only would I not see my husband for 12 hours almost everyday… I wouldn’t even get to sleep with him. It also means I will be in another person’s house alone at night in an area that I am unfamiliar with.

With anxiety and frustration flowing through me, it was hard to get myself to stop crying. Was it really too much to ask to have my husband sleep next to me at night?

After having my husband rub my back while the tears poured out of me for what seemed like forever, I pulled myself together. I got up and washed my face in cool water.

I put makeup on. I thought to myself, “If I can make myself look better on the outside, it may help me on the inside.”

And I did start feeling better.

We went to Ruby Tuesdays.

We ended the night watching Darcey and Stacey on TLC. I made myself enjoy every minute of my last normal night with my husband.

Let the 45 days begin.

That was my day… How was yours??

See you tomorrow!! Until then, follow me on instagram @ gracekbianco for more!!

(For more information on my husband’s job and how I felt about night shift, go to my other blog newkindofliving.com to read “i prayed this wouldn’t happen”.)