You are blaming yourself WAY too much. Yes, there were a few obvious red flags, but this man took advantage of you in a vulnerable state. You had been married for so many years, and were finally comfortable with dating again. He had no right to be pushy with you after you set clear boundaries. His lack of patience is on him. You deserved more than that, and I believe it is completely fine to feel giddy over dating no matter what age you are.